What a difference a month makes

I can’t believe it has already been a month with this little one. Every sleep-deprived day has been a new adventure. He’s already gained 2lbs 1oz and grown 2”…what a trip.

A book I worked on this summer is finally launching on Sunday. I’m really proud of the detail that went into this. It’s always fun rebuilding a book from scratch. Born In the Bronx by @joeconzo has been out of print for 13 years so it’s nice to have the opportunity to see it on shelves again. Many thanks to @rogergastman and @1xrun for letting me run with this. Grab the @ntwrk app to get this as well as all the other @beyondthestreetsart virtual art fair swag.

Ok, @susanttran spilled the beans while I was driving, but here we go. On Tuesday, this little one burst into our lives. Everyone say hello to Milo Ly Ames. We are obsessed with this little man and you are going to be sick of seeing him on my feed, but tough luck

I’m not going to lie, the seasonal affective disorder started way early this year. To try and combat it for my birthday and our babymoon (it’s a thing, look it up), @susanttran and I got as far away from people as we could…and just did nothing. Well, that’s not totally true, we cooked and ate, like we do at home, just not at home. I packed two bins of food and supplies (including my full knife roll, a Dutch oven, a cast iron pan), to a house we rented near Joshua Tree. Originally, I had planned on spending my 40th birthday at @_tfl_. It was something I wanted to do for 10 years…I wanted to bring friends, a true event. But then COVID happened and I had to put that on the back burner. For this birthday, food and loved ones were still on the menu, just scaled back and very quiet. Some of my favorite life events have been spent at some very special places that sadly are no longer around: Sona, @auburn.la, @dialogue.sm, @hereslookingatyoula, @bazaarbyjose, Campanile, Anisette…it’s not an exhaustive list, just places I remember fondly. What’s so unfortunate is that this list is just going to get longer. So anyway, this is 40, and apparently the new normal. Vote, wear a mask, and fuck Donald Trump.

Happiest of birthdays to @susanttran, my quarantine cutie. I love you so much! What a wild strange year this has been. This is the last time we will be celebrating with just the three of us and that is crazy and exciting!📸: @kevinscanlon

Well, this year has been wild hasn’t it? When the pandemic started I think most of us expected that we would be in for a long road full of struggle and isolation that would last through to the end of the year. @susanttran and I knew that Thanksgiving this year would be different for a great many reasons. Not the least of which being that we would not be gathering with family like we normally do as it would create an unsafe environment for the most vulnerable around us. But what we never expected at the beginning of the year is that we would have something (or more aptly someone) to be ever thankful for. @susanttran and I are excited to announce that we will be welcoming a baby boy at the end of November. We couldn’t be more excited and scared and nervous and happy and all the other emotions that have flooded us in the past 4 months. We can’t wait for you to meet him 🏻

I have struggled with how to put my feelings into words, as I’m sure many other people have. Do I, as a white person, have the right to give insight on the events of not only the last 5 days, but the last 400 years? The answer to that is no. Full stop. But what I do feel I can say is that for as much as these recent events have hurt me, knowing that there are those in this society who feel it is ok to take another person’s life with such disregard (and automatically assuming the system will cover for them)…for as much as that hurts, it’s only a fraction of what is felt in black communities on a daily basis and a pain I cannot understand. History has a long memory, but we are terrible at learning from it. We must do better, we must be willing to not just listen, but hear the voices that have been marginalized for so long. Racism isn’t a set of solitary acts, it’s foundational in systems that claim to service and protect us all. It’s time to dismantle those foundations and build new ones together, but not before we learn to educate ourselves. Watch media from black creators, read black authors, follow and support black activists. The only way we can move forward is by making sure we don’t leave anyone behind. This has been an extremely difficult time for everyone, but for the black community specifically. I know that I have privilege and there is a fine line between voicing support and virtue signaling, but I know that I have a role to play. I have never been a confrontational person. As long as I can remember, I’ve had a hard time standing up for myself, let alone other people. But I’m hoping that I can start to change, if not now, then when? I will support where I can, speak up where it’s necessary and fall back where others need to be heard. Black lives matter. They fucking matter.

It has been two years since I married my best friend*. Thank you for being my better half and for always pushing me to be more..*Since we’ve been together 19 this year and quarantined with each other for what feels like 30, this is a verifiable fact.

As promised, check my stories for the step-by-step as I make my way through @evanfunke’s lasagne recipe. This was the first time I made this from scratch and it was fantastic. But I’m not fast enough to make this for anything other than a special occasion…even though I want to eat this every day .#evanfunke #fuckyourpastamachine #pastafattaamano